Well, I think we have now completed the rounds of telling everyone in both mine and DH's family.
We have had an array of responses from 'maybe losing weight will help'(.. a personal favorite); 'well miracles happen.. just pray' (DH's favourite); 'just relax.. these things happen when you least expect them (umm..HELLO. We have a medical condition.. does cancer just go away in the same fashion??) and finally the winner 'I have a friend who has a friend, who has a sister, who has a cousin who has a boyfriend, who has a dog who has a mother... Anyway, they spent all their life savings, they didn't have any money to pay their bills or their rent/ mortgage but they pushed on because they believed they would get PG and guess what??? After their 5th IVF they got pregnant and had a beautiful baby girl.'
Now, I am all for the positive stories. Hell, if you know people who got PG their first IUI with a DX of PCOS, please go ahead and share.
However, how on earth do people (and these people are typically the ones who didn't struggle at all to get pregnant) think that telling me about so-and-so spending all their money, and failing a few times first, makes me feel good and hopeful?
I mean, I would never tell someone who lost their job 'Oh, don't worry. My friend xxx lost their job and they had no money for next three years, lost their house and got divorced: But then, right when they thought it was all over and were about to slit their wrists they got a phone call offering them this amazing job. And right after they took the job, they won 3.5 trillion on the lottery.'
It seems to me that people have lost their ability to be sensitive... The amount of times DH's sisters have told me that their parents/ grandma/ other relatives only come to see them to see their kids is unbelievable. What if we don't have kids I ask myself. Am I destined to be defined forever by the kids I do or do not have?
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"Am I destined to be defined forever by the kids I do or do not have?" Totally how I feel. At times it seems that IF can be all consuming and once you let people into that fragile world, you worry that they will forever look at you differently. People always mean well with their success stories, but at the end of the day it has nothing to do with YOU and YOUR story. No one can know how your story will turn out.
Thanks for your comment on my blog. Looking forward to reading more of your story.
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